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Life gets out
of balance when people live passively rather than actively,
We exploit
the mind body link to help people move from passive to the active
state. The mind body link takes us through a number
of
stages
to make
the
desired change.
The behaviours
that have led you to passive living happen because of your beliefs.
We all behave in accordance with our beliefs. Therefore to change
your way of life you must first change your mind.
You can do this
by:
1) Avoiding competitive negativity. Competitive negativity
is the state of trying to “out busy” everyone else you
speak to. It is the constant complaining about work so as to
be
the most stressed person in the room. Competitive negativity keeps
you trapped in the problem by focussing on the downside and has
a direct harmful effect on your body. Competitive negativity means
you can talk your way into ill health. (See article on Mind your
language for more information on this - click
here)
2) Examining
your needs and beliefs. The beliefs you hold have been
formed over time (often in childhood) and you maintain them
because they
fulfil a need. When it comes to over-working it is useful to discover
what your needs are and where you are getting them met. Think
carefully
about your needs (e.g. security, esteem, challenge, self respect
etc) and look at how many of them are getting completely
or largely
through work. If you are to avoid the over working trap you need
to meet as many of your needs as possible by life outside
work.
In that way you can arrive at work full (and ready to concentrate
on your job) instead of empty (and driven to meet your needs).
Think
of enjoyable and creative ways to meet your needs outside work.
Another way
of looking at your beliefs is to examine your past behaviours.
Make a
list of the last 3 or four occasions you felt out of control, missed
a deadline or met a deadline but became very stressed. They can
be work related or other occasions it does not matter.
Alongside each
one write down the ONE thing you could have done that would have
made the BIGGEST difference. Think about this carefully and be very
honest. You must focus on what is within YOUR control and not what
other people could have done.
Use the examples
given here to help you.
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INCIDENT
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SIGNIFICANT
CHANGE
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| I
did not get the report on the new computer system finished in
time because there was a last minute problem with the figures
from the suppliers |
I
could have asked for the figures earlier in the process (allowing
for problems) |
| I
missed the train to town the night I was going to the theatre,
and did not see most of the first act. |
I
could have left for the station earlier to allow for the bad
traffic. |
| I
did not hear the chairman's opening remarks at the board meeting
because the team briefing I was in overran by 10 minutes. |
I
should have asked for the team briefing to start earlier or
to be moved to another day to avoid the clash. |
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UNDERLYING
PATTERN
|
| I
do not allow a safety margin of time in case things go wrong,
and so it is touch and go whether or not I succeed. |
Use the table
below to record the situations that have caused you problems most
recently. Then you can either work out the underlying pattern yourself
or email the information to us and we will analyse it for you. Remeber
to be honest when completing the form.
3) The practical
changes. Once you have aligned your beliefs and attitudes
to the new life you want to lead you need to make the practical
changes
that allow you to manage your workload in such a way as to free
up your time and balance your life. Here is a brief overview
of
each of the changes you need to make.
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